Being a Mentor

Today, I had my first "resident" moment. In the middle of pre-rounds, while seeing all the patients with my interns, I had one stop and break down. He told me that he had no idea what was going on and he couldn't keep it together. I understood that the patient was complicated, but he was stable and improving from our treatment. I calmly put my hand on his shoulder and explained to him that feeling overwhelmed happens to all interns and that he had nothing to worry about because we all went through it. I explained to his that I was his back-up and I'd be there to guide him and help him along the process. I felt for him because I know I've felt the same way multiple times last year even if I did not express it. He calmed down, was able to keep it together and proceeded through the day. I checked in on him repeatedly and worked our way through patients he that felt prepared to take care of them. If someone hadn't done the same for me, I would be where I am today. In that, medicine is an interesting profession. You learn an infinite amount of information, but none of it counts unless you pass it down to the people who come up behind you. Mentoring is a fundamental process of residency and I feel like I got my first taste of it.

I had a lot of people say that I was pretty calm as an intern, but I always felt that it was on the surface, and I could break down at any moment. It lead to sleepless nights and a lot of anxiety. I am thankful to think that I'm starting to get past those moments and I'm starting to work my way towards being a real physician. It's exciting to see how far I've come. I don't think I'm close to be where I need to, but I am confident to know that I'm getting better and more confident through each step of the process. My wife was right all along, she usually is.

I'm thankful that I have an attending who is a recent graduate, so he understands what it is like being in training. He is patient, educational, and cool, which is all that is needed in a good teacher. I hope to mimic those qualities in the people that I work with.

This is also a reminder that I was lucky to grow up with parents who are mentors and have infinite patience. Without their teachings, I'm not sure I could hold it together or be able to teach a struggling person at the cost of my own work to be done.